Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Kisses! And missing Daddy...

There is nothing more beautiful or appreciated (to me, obviously) than when Lola takes it upon herself to show affection.

Sure, sometimes, she uses hugs and kisses to try to get out of bedtime or bath time –but, now, she has been giving them freely as thank yous. And it makes me beam.

Ray has been out of town for the first part of this week. So it was just Lola and I Monday through Wednesday (except that we did have some help Monday as my dad came up to babysit while I worked for a few hours).

Last night was a trying night for both Lola and I. She was cranky, I was tired. We made frozen pizza, which I simply just cannot eat anymore (long story – basically we had waaaaaay too much frozen pizza while we were in limbo on our closing date with the house – and ever since, I just can’t eat it. Blech. You would think after 3-4 months, this would subside, but not yet…). Lola thought it was bad, too. So then we were both hungry and cranky and tired.

So we ”veged’ on the couch while watching some Dora. I figured Lola needed a treat, so she and I had some pretzels, which are (apparently) her most favorite snack ever. After about 10 pretzels, I went to put the bag away and Lola objected, “More please?”

I gave her 3-4 more and she crawled over into my lap, threw her legs over mine (so we were stretched out with my legs on the coffee table) and she turned and kissed me on the cheeks, “Thank you.”

Too sweet.

We did OK while Ray was gone, although I certainly did not enjoy handling garbage night on my own. (Ick.) Lola was, of course, confused and wanted to know where Ray was; she asked for “daddy” countless times Monday and yesterday. Several times, she would go and get her photo book, come sit with me and point out pictures of her daddy. She doesn’t understand – or at least doesn’t yet verbalize – feelings like missing someone or loving someone (she does talk about when she is happy and sad, but that’s about as close as we get), but to see her pointing at shots of Ray, you knew what she was thinking, “I miss my daddy.”

Another cute story: Lola no longer really cries when she wakes up in the morning. She bellows for her parents. Usually it’s “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” (somehow she does this for like 15 minutes without seeming to take a single breath) but this morning, I heard her softly babbly to her ladybug toy. I just listened for a few minutes until she started getting restless. And before I could get there, I heard her get impatient, “Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!” I walked in, ready to get her started for the day but she just smiled and shook her head, “No Mommy. Daddy.” And usually this would pain me, but I knew she was really missing her father by now. So I told her daddy would be home later tonight.

But she still wasn’t happy. So she turned to the next-best option: She asked to come into the big bed (sometimes, on weekends, we bring her into the big bed while she has her morning water or juice. We don’t let her fall asleep (we’re not co-sleepers) but we all have some extra relaxation time before getting up to face the day). Anyhow, she looked up at me, holding her favorite blanket and said, “Big bed?” And I agreed (what was the harm?) and she scurried down the hallway to my room – but she stopped as she as she stepped inside.

“No Daddy.”

She dropped her blanket and put her hands up in that familiar “what the heck” motion. And she looked at me sadly. Then I felt bad. I didn’t realize she figured Ray was still sleeping.

I was able to, eventually distract her and get her ready for day care, but I know someone who will be getting big hugs and some kisses tonight!

- Bethany :)


mk said...

Priceless...reminds me of that pic of the two of us that you had blown up along time ago - the one with you giving me the huge, happy bear hug!

michellerose14 said...

This sounds just like Madeline, and from what Marilee tells us, she is starting to do the babbling to herself in the morning instead of screaming too, though I accidentally taught her "mom" instead of "mommy." I love the age they're at, actually trying to understand things instead of just crying out of frustration - you write it very well!