Here's a not-very-recent-but-kind-of-recent email exchange between myself and Ray.
Me: FYI, I'll be working late-ish tonight, like til 6ish. You probably should get Millie, just in case. And tomorrow, I'll be home to help with gymnastics but afterward, at 7 p.m., I'm going to the airport for an interview for a while.
Me: Thank you. Also, we need milk if you're buying groceries.
Ray: Lola and I will stop before I get Millie.
Me: ty (thank you)
Ray: Fyi I have a meeting on Tuesday that might go till six. It's a Tuesday so you'll be on your own at gymnastics for a bit, is that okay
Me: I'll make it work. I have an interview from 4-5:30 that day but I'll figure it out. I do have school board Monday though. At 5. So you'll be doing it all that night.
Ray: That's fine
Ray: Go Team Wesley! A marriage is so different than what I thought it was.
Me: Um, in a good way or bad way?
Ray: Neither just it's not all about love. Don't get me wrong you need that but you also need to work together and put up with each other. I feel like all we do is juggle life.
Me: But isn't it love that makes you want to help and vice versa? I mean, it's love that makes you willing to compromise on things that you really don't want to, because you know that the other person needs you, depends on you. But I do agree. I think that's why marriage is often referred to as a partnership, or spouses as partners.
Ray: Fyi usually fear is why I help you. :-)